Machiach, Machiach!

Parshas Ki Teitzei continues discussing how when mashiach arrives, Israel will expand to become the entire world. We are currently in the period awaiting the mashiach. The way to bring mashiach is through the act of cheesed- doing kindness without any expectation to receive anything back!  Just like a parent/child relationship, the parents endlessly give to the child without expecting anything in return, we too should learn to develop this middah with all the people we encounter. We are ALL Hashem’s children. He does so much for us that the least we can do is help His children, our very own brothers and sisters. Take a few minutes each day and see how you can change the world, community or even your own home. Essentially, through extra acts of kindness, we are speedily bringing the machiach and the expansion of Eretz Israel!

Shabbat shalom

-Esther Shamayev

Ki Teitzei- Marrying for the RIGHT reasons

This week’s parsha, Ki Teitzei, begins its discussion with the laws considering the Yefat Toar- laws concerning a captive gentile woman whom a  Jewish solider wants to marry.

Even in times of war, the Torah demands that Jewish men conduct themselves in the utmost proper manner, the highest level of kedusha- holiness- is expected from a Jewish solider.

However, the Torah creates an exception for a Jewish man to take a gentile captive as his wife for a number of reasons. If gentile women were forbidden to Jewish men, naturally the yatzar hara- evil inclination- would desire the women even more so, we always want what we can’t have; hence the Torah finds a way to appease the yatzar hara in order to prevent a person from committing additional sins. Although the Torah permits this union, there are many laws attached to it, in order to prevent a Jewish man from undergoing this type of marriage.

Even though the men in the army had the status of tzaddikim, the excitement of battle was known to bring them spiritually off balance. Even though man might have been momentarily hypnotized by his passion, the laws of Yesat Toar were meant for him to reconsider his true intentions behind marrying her.

The Jewish solider is permitted to marry the gentile woman under the following conditions:

1.      In order to make sure that the Jewish man is marrying this gentile with pure motivations, she must be stripped of her external beauty: she must shave her head (hair beautifies a woman), she must grown out her nails (so that they look unkempt and ugly),  she must trade in her elegant clothing for clothes of mourning.

2.       She is also must undergo a process of purification for one month, in order for her to adjust to her new environment, and to dissociate herself from idol worship. During this period she is also making preparations to convert; however, if she refuses to convert, she must be sent away—the Torah forbids enslaving her.

Moreover, the Torah creates these prohibitions in order to portray that this type of marriage is not recommended. Additionally, these laws emphasize that people should not base marriage on only external factors, allowing their passion overcome their neshama’s pure desires. However, when a person marries to sanctify Hashem’s name, he will have children who are Torah scholars.

In our society, we too are faced with the dilemma of marrying for impure intentions. When looking for a person to marry, we focus on their status, job, money, education, physical attributes, family history, etc., rather than looking at their inner attributes, we are blinded by the fleeting external components, then we wonder why divorce rates are so high! People are unfortunately overcome by their passion and marry the wrong people for all the wrong reasons. The prescription to finding the right person however is finding a person who has a pure heart with even purer intentions. A person who wants to continuously develop themselves, their middot, and their connection with Hashem all the days of their lives, is a what we should be looking for!

We should all look at the laws pertaining to the Yefat Toas to remind us not to let our evil inclination rule over us.  May we all be blessed with the clarity to know we are dating/marrying a person who also has the purest of intentions to developing a marriage and family leshaim shemayim!

Parshas Shoftim- What our Sages have to teach...

This week’s parsha discusses fundamental aspects for Jewish leadership, such as, establishing Jewish courts, laws pertaining to the conduct of a Jewish king, and laws pertaining to the conduct of judges.

We are told to obey all the rulings of the Great Sanhedrin and the Torah Sages of all generations.  The Great Sanhedrin, consisting of 71 judges, had the ultimate authority regarding Jewish law. The Torah tells us not to depart from their ruling. Hashem reserved this authority to the Sages to preserve the Torah. If each Jew were to interpret the Torah as he saw fit, the entire Torah would be inconsistent and the Jewish nation would not have survived as long as they have.

Moreover, a person who instructs the Jewish people against the Sanhedrin may incur the death penalty.

In our society today, we all think we know what’s best for us. We consider the Torah as ‘ out dated’ and ‘no longer pertaining to us,’ since we have become such a modern civilization, we think we no longer a religion to keep us humane. Well, let us look at the current world we live in. Despite the fact that we have advanced technologically, biologically, psychologically, scientifically, etc., we still seem to be fighting barbaric wars, both worldly and internally. Maybe we should bite our tongues and listen to what our dear Rabbis have to teach us. The ancient wisdom they have to share may be the antidote to the internal and external warfare we are faced with. By living according to the true essence of what religion has to teach, as Hashem had wanted, maybe we will achieve a world as connected to Hashem has the times of the Great Sanhedrin.

The HUMBLE Jewish King

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The parsha continues discussing the mitzvah to appoint a Jewish King...

After settling into the land if Israel, the Jews were commanded to appoint a Jewish king, destroy Amalek, and build the Bait Hamikdash.

The essence behind a Jewish monarchy is to build the Jewish nation and to elevate the Jewish people religiously (govern them with Jewish law- halachot- and bring righteousness to the nation).

In order to prevent the king from sinning and becoming arrogant, Hashem prescribed the following laws for the king:

1.     He may not have extra horses.

2.     He may not have more than 18 wives.

3.     He may not accumulate excess wealth, other than that necessary to build and maintain his army.

4.     He must write a Sefer Torah and keep it with him at all times.

5.     He must read parts of the Book of Devarim at a nation assembly every seven years.

Reasons behind these laws:

1.     Horses were bred in Egypt and Hashem didn’t want the Jews going back to Egypt for any reason. Also, horses symbolized power, wealth, and arrogance, Hashem didn’t not want the Jewish king to amass more than he needed, hence he would succumb to arrogance. Arrogance leads a man away from Hashem.

2.     The king was forbidden to have more than the prescribed number of wives because this can lead a man from Torah studying and observance. The gentile kings had large harems and Hashem did not want the Jewish king to emulate such promiscuous behavior. The role of the Jewish king was to govern the people according to the standards of Torah, not to pursue his personal physical desires.

Indeed, King Solomon had many wives, but on his high level of intelligence, he declared that he was able to withstand all the trials without sinning. In other words, he put himself through the extra struggle in order that Hashem would reward him heavily for defeating his yatar hara. However, as we see, King Solomon was not able to withstand the tests, and his wives did make him go stray.

3.     The king was forbidden to accumulate more wealth than his nation needed, because Hashem did not want his personal lust for money take over. Rather Hashem wanted the king to develop his good inclination and to be conscious of providing for his nation.

4.     The king was commanded to write a Sefer Torah and to have it on him at all times. Wherever he was, he was obligated to internalize that he was Hashem’s servant. Whenever the king had a free moment, he was obligated to study torah.  The king was to be a righteous Torah scholar and leader so that he would be an example to his people.

5.     The king was obligated to occupy himself with Torah study and observe Hashem’s mitzvot constantly!

The king had a highly respected role, a person who disrespected him could be executed, no one was allowed to ride his horse or sit on his throne, and everyone (except the kohan gadol) was obligated to bow in his presence. Hashem wanted the Jewish people to give honor to their king, for he represented Hashem’s Kingship.

Despite the honor the king was given, the king maintained his humility.  He was constantly in a state of thanksgiving, for being endowed with such a distinguished position. The king was continuously taught not to be haughty,(must carry a Sefer Torah, and all other rules to remind him of his ultimate mission in life, to be Hashem’s servant) so to, how much more are we to develop our humility in the face of Hashem? Seeing that the Jewish king, the ambassador to God, saw His imminence and serviced him in such humility, this should teach us that we too are ambassadors to God who must strive to connect to and follow His Torah!

In this month of Elul, each day we are getting closer and closer to the high holy days, we should be mindful of ways we can develop our humility in front of God. May we all be blessed with the courage to develop that awareness and pursue an everlasting connection with the Source of all, today, tomorrow, and for the rest of our lives! AMEN and SHABBOT SHALOM!

QUOTES THAT MATTER!

Parshat Shoftim

Passuk Kaf Bet (22) “And You shall not set up for yourself a monument, which Hashem, your G-d hates.”

Rashi comments on the words “which Hashem your G-d hates,” Hashem has commanded you to make an altar of stones and altar of Earth. This, however, He hates, because this was a religious statue of the Canaanites, and although it was dear to Hashem,  He hates it, since these people made it a statue for idolatry’’.

            Nowadays, we too take something that Hashem likes and then instead of using it for good, its use becomes a form of idolatry. Especially with technology, we are so involved in it that we don’t even hear out parents talking to us! It’s scary how we are so attached enslaved by these gadgets! Hashem does like the fact that technology provides us with efficient ways to communicate. However, we have turned what was meant to be used for goodness into a form of idolatry. For example, we let technology waste our precious time! We watch phony movies and waste precious tears over them, we stalk people on facebook, which may lead us to speak loshan hara and/or writing rude comments about one another, etc. Therefore, now, Hashem, your G-d, hates it because technology is holding you captive, the Yetzer Hara- Evil Inclination trapped you. It made you into a person who acts like a Rasha- and evil person. We have completely hypnotized by the ipad, ipod, computer, and television screen world-- the fourth dimension,  the fake world.  Scary isn’t it!  There must be a battle plan that we can use to overcome our challenges we have nowadays; which is Technology!

Battle Plan:

Step one: talk to Hashem, your G-d and ask Him to help you overcome this Yetzer Hara- Evil Inclination.

Step two: The Ramchal writes in Messilat Yesharim that the way to overcome the Evil Inclination is to keep yourself busy with Torah, Mitzvot and Chessed, that way the Evil Inclination has no time to trap you.

Step three: if you have nothing to do, immediately find something to do!

Here are some options:

1. Call a friend and learn something with him/her.
2. Go online to torahanytime.com, simpletoremember.com and listen to any lecture you would like to hear about.
3. Give a helping hand.

Shabbat Shalom,

Esther Shamayev

Change we can believe in!

          We are soon approaching Chodesh Elul. Hashem is so kind to us that He has given us forty days from Rosh Chodesh Elul until Yom Kippur to do teshuva. Hashem is waiting so patiently for His children to come back to Him and rekindle our relationship with Him. The way to do teshuva is by doing ‘Cheshbon Hanefesh’- checking your actions DAILY. The evil inclination is very wise and even more cunning than you know! It wants to keep you busy with the material world and have you waste your time on trivial things.

Since the evil inclination keeps you so busy, you don’t have time to evaluate your relationship with Hashem. The forty days, from the first of Elul to Yom Kippur, are days where Hashem won’t deny your request to return to Him. He is waiting for you to knock on His door!

 We have to be strong and overcome the challenges we endure. Our desires in this century are fashion, technology and money. To overcome these desires one needs to understand that if Hashem gave you a certain desire there is a cure for it. Hashem doesn’t give His children something they cannot overcome. We need to train ourselves to pick up chumash rather than the remote control! We must strive to fill our precious time with learning Torah and developing ourselves, rather than with chasing worldly pursuits. When we go to the next world we are not taking our savings account, house, clothing etc. with us; however, we are taking our mitzvot!  With that we will be judged.

WORKSHOP:

 Now take five or ten minutes and write down on a piece of paper how you want to change this year in each of the following areas:

1.     Ben Adam L’Chavero_Relationship between man and man:

Ex: judge people favorably, greet someone with a smile, help someone_visit the sick, and babysit for free etc.

2.     Ben Adam L’Makon_Relationship between man and G-d:

Ex: pray with more concentration; stand in one spot while saying Asher Yatzar_prayer after using bathroom etc.

3.     Ben Adam L’Atzmo_Relationship with yourself:

Ex: work on one of your negative character traits; make time to learn Torah etc.

May we all be judged in the book of life, Amen!
Esther Shamayev

Parshas Re’ay- enjoying the smooth ride...

This week’s parsha begins with Moshe telling Bnai Israel that a Jew brings a blessing upon himself when he performs a mitzvah and a curse when he transgresses. 

Moshe says,

“In every aspect of daily life, you are faced with the choice whether or not to obey Hashem. Know that this actually involves the choice of whether to bring blessing or curse, life or death, upon yourself.”

Ultimately, we all have the free will to make choices in our lives, between right or wrong and following mitzvot or transgressing the Torah. We all have the choice, between observing the mitzvot; thereby, we will reap blessings, or we can transgress, and incur curses.

The right choice is challenging. Hashem even warns us that the road of Torah observance may be tough and troublesome at times; however, the destination is worthwhile. Initially, the path towards following the mitzvot may be bumpy; however, further down the road, the journey will be smooth and comfortable.  Conversely, the path of sinning may initially be smooth; however, the road will eventually become obstructed.

Similarly, in our own lives, we tend to get discouraged when we want to get closer to Hashem and observe more mitzvot, feeling that the road is simply too challenging. The beginning is the hardest part, following or adding new mitzvot sometimes seems impossible! However, we must always remember that this leap must be made in order for us to reap blessings from Hashem. Once you courageously do so, you can enjoy the rest of the smooth journey, while admiring your bravery and persistence.