Cry No More

Parsha Devarim- Fast of Ninth of Av

 

How can I bear alone your weight, and your burden and your contentiousness?

In his use of the word איכה (How,) Moses hinted to them that their future generations will read מגילת איכה (the book of Ecclesiastes, which we read in the eve of ט באב, the ninth of Av. As the Rambam comments on the first verse of Numbers 14, in the name of רבי יוחנן (Rabbi Yochanan), where it is written,

ותשא כל העדה ויתנו את קולם ויבכו העם בלילה ההוא

The entire community raised a loud cry and the people wept that night.

That night was the ninth of Av. G-d told the Children of Israel, Because you wept for no cause, I will designate this day to be a day of mourning for future generations. The first Temple and the Second Temple were both destroyed on the ninth of Av.

Another explanation is the word איכה can be read א-יכה or Where are you? To teach us that a person must always look inside to find himself as Rav Kook said, the best תשובה (repentance) a person can to is לשוב אל עצמו, to return to himself." (Parsha Devarim)

What can we do this Tisha B'Av differently? 

What is it that we can do to bring the redemption?

Why are we fasting?

What are we lacking?

In Messilat Yesharim, Ramchal writes that " A person should be careful with his actions and with what path he takes. If you don't pay attention to what you are doing you are leaving your soul open to spiritual destruction. A person who doesn't examine his actions will most likely be killed". One of the ways of the yetzer hara is that he keeps you  busy to the point that you don't have time to think of what you are doing with your life. To better understand this, we can look at how Pharoh worked the men in Mitzrayim.  He wanted to work the men so hard that they had no time to plan against him. This is a tactic of the Yetzer Hara. A fast day is supposed to be a time where we stop and think, "Why are we fasting?" What did we lose that we need to regain? When a person doesn't eat, their body is lacking its physical nutrients  it needs for that day. So too, as we fast for our Beit Hamikdash, we have to try to understand what we are lacking in our own spiritual life that is preventing the Biet Hamikdash from being rebuilt. When a person is distracted with materialistic things he is depriving his neshema from realizing what he needs to work on spiritually. These modern day distractions are unlike the ones in the past where even with  washing machines and microwaves which help get errands done quicker, we are still finding ourselves distracted and deprived. Due to the fact that we have many television programs and all types of electronics that take up our time, it prevents us from realizing what is missing within us. Fun Fact: Apple iPods, iPhones, Mac etc. all have the symbol of a bitten apple. This bitten apple is a symbol which I'm sure no one has ever noticed to be a symbol of the sin with Adam, Chava and the snake. This apple represents the modern day yetzer hara-technology and materialism which is a struggle very hard to overcome. Lets use this fast day as an opportunity to focus and stop depriving ourselves of the spiritual nutrients due to the"bitten apple". Let's move aside our technology and give a day to sincerely cry out to Hashem that we NEED Mashiach now! Amen

Hope everyone has an easy and meaningful fast!

"Words are Our Bonds"

In this weeks parsha, "Matot-Masei" it begins with Moshe giving over the laws of  regarding taking of a vow or swearing an oath. G-d commanded: "If a man takes a vow to G-d or swears an oath to bind himself by a prohibition, he shall not break his word; according to whatever comes out of his mouth he shall do." (30:2-3) We lost the power of speech. Nowadays, we don't think before we speak. No one understands how much power s/he has in their mouth. By speaking in a negative way that person creates a blockage of "I can't" in his atmosphere. If a person speaks positively then he creates for himself an atmosphere where he "can" do it. G-d created the world with ten utterances. Why then, doesn't it say that G-d created the world by building it? To teach us that through our mouth we have the ability to create good or bad. We can either make a person or break a person by the words that we use. Speech is an amazing tool. We are the only creations that are like a mini G-d. We were created in the image of Hashem. This means we can almost create anything like G-d however, on a smaller scale. G-d created the world through speech and we create good or bad depending on how we use our speech on a daily basis. It is very important to maintain a positive outlook on life otherwise, by constantly saying negative words you have created an insufficient force where nothing will succeed. In order to build a better future one needs to acquire positive thoughts for him to succeed. This week lets try to have one positive thought a day. By having positive thoughts your words will start to change. All it takes is one thought which can help change the world! The more we guard our words, the more real they become. Don't make a promise if you cannot keep it, so at the end it's better to say "bli neder"- without a promise. Our job is to create a revolution with the words that come out of our mouths. We always sing "we want Mashiach now" but on a scale of one-ten do we really want him? How real are your words that come out of your mouth?
Shabbat Shalom,
Esther Shamayev

DEVELOPING EMPATHY

Parshas Vayaishev

This week’s parsha, Vayaishev, begins discussing the brother’s hatred toward Yoseph. Yoseph’s brothers thought that he was attempting to be Yaakov’s only succeeding son, as Yitzkak succeeded Yishmael and as Yaakov succeeded Aisev (because Yoseph would tell Yaakov when his brother’s transgressed the Torah, making them deserving of capital punishment—their transgressions are arguable however, seeing that the Torah was not yet officially given).

Now, Yaakov’s son’s thought that Yoseph was a pretender to the throne. They thought he spoke lashon hara and needed to be put to death. We have to remember, these men were tzaddkim- righteous men- and they thought they were doing a mitzvah by plotting against Yoseph. Their intentions were leshaim shemayim- for the name of Hashem. However, they were extremely quick to judge the legitimacy of Yoseph’s behavior. Rather, than judging him favorable, they made the worst possible judgment about him, a judgment that caused the brothers to sell him to the Egyptians!

This should shed some light onto all of us. In life, we tend to make quick judgments about people, whether they are righteous or not. We may hear lashon hara- gossip- spoken about other people, and be too quick to assume the worst. Moreover, our evil inclination is so excited to hear something negative about someone, reaffirming that we are better. Even if the rumors are true, that never gives us the right to judge.

No matter where we stand religiously, we must all take a stand to correct our behavior and not let the truth be distorted by our envious evil inclination.

What is the truth you may ask? The truth is that we are all created in the image of G-d. We all have a G-dly soul that desires to be good and do good. We must always take into consideration that a person behaves the way he does for a reason—he is a product of his environment and he is letting that be a determining factor of his behavior.

Next time, before you are quick to judge someone’s inappropriate behavior, etc., keep in mind that his G-dly soul wants better, he just has not developed that part of himself; however, he does in fact have a G-dly light that shines within him, he just needs the light to be turned on.

How can this light be turned on you ask? Be the one to ignite the spark! Instead of assuming the worst, try to be more empathetic  For example, it’s early and you have not had your coffee yet, and the barista at the coffee shop is being rude to you, in your tired irritable mood, you immediately make a judgment about the him being a terrible person. Rather than assuming the worst, try to put yourself in that person’s shoes (as much as you possibly can) and realize, hey, it’s early and he is probably tired and irritable too.

You can also take a moment and think rationally before you let your evil inclination make irrational conclusions, ‘I have had a bad day before and acted even crazier, and I am not a terrible person (I hope you all hold yourselves in high esteem).’ Rather, you can ask the barista how he is doing (you will be surprised by how effective a small gesture of kindness will go). Yes, I know, this is a basic example, but once you adopt this mentality in as many situations as possible, your outlook on life will change, and you will be a spark that kindles souls. Your developed empathy will protrude onto others and you will truly make a difference in the lives of others, but most importantly in yourself. Developing your empathy is key for seeing a G-dly soul in all people.

Bitachon is the Best way to go

The parsha continues discussing the selling of Yoseph as a slave in Egypt. Yoseph ends up working for the Pharaoh, Potifar. While he was enslaved to him, Potifar’s wife, Zulaicha, was advised by an astrologer that her descendents would come from Yoseph’s lineage. Thinking that she was the person to create this lineage, she started to seduce Yoseph (the astrology was correct; however, it was her daughter that was meant to marry Yoseph, not her).

When Yoseph refused her, seeing that it would be an adulterous act, Zulaicha told her husband that Yoseph had in fact been the instigator. Of course, the issue was settled and Potifar eventually found out the truth about Yoseph’s innocence; nonetheless, he needed to spare him and his wife the embarrassment.

While serving his ten year sentence in jail, Yoseph met Potifar’s butler and baker, who were jailed because Potifar found a pebble in his bread and a fly in his wine.

One morning, the butler and baker awoke and desperately needed their dreams  interpreted. After listening to their dreams, Yoseph predicted that the butler would be saved, and the baker would be killed. When Yoseph’s predictions came true (Hashem always makes the pronouncements of a tzaddick come true) Yoseph told the butler to tell the Pharoah that he was innocent and to release him from the dungeon.

The butler was dedicated to fulfill Yoseph’s word; however, everyday, the butler would somehow forget. In actuality, Hashem had sent an angel to prevent that from happening. Hashem was upset that Yoseph put his trust in the butler to save him and not in Hashem to save.  Hashem was trying to make a point to Yoseph that government officials are forgetful and disinterested in helping you, but it is Hashem who will save you.

In life, we too forget to look to Hashem to be saved. We lose sight of Hashem being the ruler of the world. We let the craziness of our lives get the best of us and forget that everything that happens has been destined by Him for us. Any harm, any luck any happiness, any sadness that befalls us is all from Hashem. People who have wronged us, who have brought us joy, etc., are all merrily agents sent to us by Him to fulfill His Divine will. We need to develop our bitachon-trust in Hashem- and realize that we do not have control of what happens to us. Rather, we must know that Hashem is in control of all that happens to us. He is the only one who can redeem us from any misfortune we endure. Similarly, He is the only one who has bestowed His kindness upon us and given us all the amazing lives we live. We must develop our bitachon and realize that all the affairs of the world are manipulated by Hashem alone, and He is the only one who can alter our fate.

Developing your bitachon exercises:

1.      Internalize this: We have been sent on a journey and the only thing we can control is our thoughts, actions, and speech.

2.       We do not have control over how other people treat us, but we do have control over how we treat them.

3.       We don’t have control over what other people say to us, but we have control over how we react.                                                                                       Hashem sends us all these tests to develop our character traits—next time someone says or does something mean/disrespectful, rather than fighting evil with evil, fight it with kindness!

ISRAELI DILEMMA-- or our personal dilemma?

Could it be that the pain and suffering that the Jews in Israel are facing are because of our sins?

Could it be that each time we curse, fight, speak negatively about one another give Hamas the power to launch another rocket? Each curse adds on another rocket.

 Can we stop this catastrophe?

Yes we can! 

 How?

By changing ourselves!

 How can I change myself? I feel perfectly fine!

Take a mitzvah upon yourselves and be obsessed with and do not let anything stand in your way to do this special mitzvah.

Please take a moment to realize where our brothers and sisters are heading into.

We as the Jewish nation have the capability to change a decree! We have the power to create positive change! Tweeking ourselves even moderately are the first steps to create lasting change!

As Chanukah approaches, we need to ask ourselves, are we going to stand for our nation, or are we going to stand for laziness and just live our lives like we don’t care? 

Like Mattiyahu said, “Mi LaHashem Elay,” “Whoever is for Hashem come join me!”

If we are for Hashem we need to do whatever it takes to save the Jewish nation!

Shabbot Shalom--Esther Shameyev

Parshat Vayaitzay -- pushing ourselves up the ladder

 

This week’s parsha, Vayaitzay, discusses the famous dream prophetic dream Yaakov had of the ladder.

On Yaakov’s journey, fleeing from Aisev, then studying in a yeshiva for fourteen years, Yaakov was now on his way to find a wife. His journey continued to Charan. When he arrived to Charan, he realized that he had passed Mount Moriah, the place his father and grandfather had stopped to pray to Hashem. Distressed that he did not stop and pray, he decided to go all the way back to pray! What dedication!

This was of course Hashem’s plan in the works, He wanted Yaakov to go back to Mount Moriah, because of the kedusha-holiness-at Mount Moriah, Yaakov was able to have intense prophecy.

When Yaakov went to sleep, Hashem revealed Himself to him in a dream. The purpose of the dream was to strengthen Yaakov, he was being chased by Aisev (because Yaakov had stolen Aisev’s birthright blessing) and was robbed by his nephew, I imagine his morale was lower than usual. The dream was meant to show Yaakov that despite the hardships he was currently facing, Hashem was there to guide him now and in the future.

Details of the dream:

A ladder extended from the earth to the Heavens, and an angel was climbing up and down it. The angel climbed seventy rungs and then fell (foreshadowing the seventy years the Jews would be exiled in Babylonia). Yaakov knew that after seventy years of exile, the Jewish people would be liberated by Hashem.

The next angel climbed fifty-two rungs, the fell, foreshadowing the Median exile of fifty-two years.

The third angel climbed up a hundred and twenty steps and fell, foreshadowing the length of the Greek exile.

Finally, the last angel, of Edom, our current exile, the angel continued higher and higher up the ladder, appearing to ascent even into the Heavens! Yaakov thought this last exile would persist forever; however, Hashem assured him that it WOULD in fact end.

In life, we too are climbing up an endless ladder, trying to make it to the top. At times we may feel that we will never get there, but rather we will crumble to the bottom. As we persevere to the top, facing much strife, wanting to give up many times, we must always continue to find Hashem’s guiding voice in the back of our heads, telling us, we WILL in fact make it to the top! The effort must be continuous, despite the many setbacks we may face. When the day finally comes, when we taste the glory awaiting us at the top of the ladder, we will know with certainty that all the fighting and struggling served its rightful purpose and we became better people and better Jews because of it.

Shabbot Shalom! May Hashem bless us all with the courage and grace to keep persevering to the top, where we can actualize our fullest potential in this world!

Parshat Toldot-- --FINDING THE PERFECT BALANCE

            

 In this weeks parsha it speaks about how Rivka was pregnant with twins; when she passed the yeshiva of Shem ve’ever one child would kick, desiring to come out. When she would pass a place of idol worshipping her other child would kick so hard to come out. She then went to a prophet and he said that she will have two nations. They both will go in their own separate ways. 

            Rivka gave birth first to Eisav and then Yaakov. Eisav was into physicality, hunting, killing, and acting immorally; while Yaakov was full of spirituality and learning Torah. We learn that Yitzchak favored Eisav more when Rivka favored Yaakov more. How can it be that Yitzchak would love a Rasha like Eisav? Yitzchak knew he wasn’t a Tzaddik but he knew that Eisav had the potential to be great through by channeling his physicality.

            We learn a very important lesson from this parsha. Hashem put us in a world of physicality, which He wants us to enjoy. However, we have to find a compromise between these two worlds-- the physical and spiritual worlds. We don’t want to over indulge in the physical like Eisav and not end up reaching our spiritual potential. We need to incorporate the spirituality Yaakov had. 

We need to have that right balance, especially in the world today.  Ways to integrate our physical world to a spiritual plain-- balancing the physicality with spirituality:

1.     If you have an iPod, iPhone or iPad download an app that can bring you closer to Hashem and Judaism. Search for Torah and look what will come up.

2.     If you are addicted in watching television, minimize your time you spend watching it. If you watch television for 5 hours a day (I really hope you don't!) cut it down to 2 ½ hours.

3.     If you are afraid to tap into your spiritual side. Don’t be. All you need to do is talk to your Creator, your G-d, your King and most of all, your Father.

*There are many other ways to balance but these are the few I hope can help you become more in tuned to Spirituality.

SHABBBOT SHALOM!!

Esther Shamayev